Nacwolin's D-land Archives

This is what happens when the guys pick the movie...

I think that says it all.

A few weeks back, our family went out to eat with a large group, about 20 or so of us all together. And don't you know that it is at times like these that, almost without fail, at least one of your children will embarrass you?

This time it was the 4-year-old's turn. The Youngest had to go to the bathroom. This is standard procedure whenever we go out to eat. We are lucky if we make it through a meal with only one trip to the restroom.

The Youngest announced, loudly as usual, that he needed to go potty. So, being the good mom that I am, and noticing that my darling hubby was engaged in conversation and totally oblivious to the child's plight, I dutifully took him to the bathroom.

Upon our return to the table, The Youngest stood up on his chair and announced, louder than ever...

"MY PRIVATES STICKIN' OUT!!"

"Shhhhh!" I whispered, fighting the urge to cover his mouth and duck and hide.

"BUT...MY...PRIVATES...STICKIN'...OUT!!"

Have I mentioned how tenacious our little one is?

So, being the good mom that I am, I immediately motioned to his dad.

"Your son has a problem that he needs your help with."

"What's wrong, [insert name here]?"

"MY PRIVATES STICKIN' OUT!!"

Dad quickly wisked him back to the restroom to make the necessary adjustments. And if anyone at the table heard, they didn't let on.

Perhaps they thought my red face was from the jalepenos.

Today was the long-awaited Tea for all of us "mothuhs". It actually turned out really nice, despite The Middle's teacher's control freak tendencies.

I got there right on the dot of 1 PM, to walk in and see The Middle looking rather glum, shoulders slumped. As soon as he saw me he straightened up and smiled real big.

Growing up

Poor guy thought I'd forgotten (and boy was I glad I remembered when I did, because I almost did forget - YIKES!).

The event started out with all of the moms working on a picture frame and word puzzles with their kiddos. Then we were summoned outside to the "pod" (big open area with all the classrooms on the perimeter) for the musical tribute. The Middle had a part in the first song, and he was absolutely adorable (don't you know that at 8 years old, he must be SO thrilled that his mom would call him absolutely adorable?).

Next we enjoyed some snacks and they gave us homemade gifts (small candy holder) and cards. The kids also had made portraits of each of us. As we finished up, the teacher read clues the kids had come up with to help us guess which drawing was which mom, sometimes reading or describing what was written or drawn on the mom's shirt.

As soon as she read what The Middle had written on my t-shirt, I knew it was mine:

"Don't Mess With Me. I'm a Mother."

I think that says it all!

Inquiring minds want to know...why a goldfish bowl?

(Well, maybe not, but work with me here!)

Many of you know that my hubby is a pastor. Life in full-time ministry can put you, and your family, under mega-scrutiny. You are watched, examined, judged, sometimes unfairly. And at times you feel as if you are under a microscope, or behind glass...

Or in a goldfish bowl.

People may actually say things like, "No other pastor's wife that I have had would say (or do) that!" Or they feel they have liberty to comment on your latest hairstyle, clothes, if you have, or have not, gained or lost weight ("Oh, you got your hair cut. I thought you were a guy from the back.").

Life isn't all bad though, and sometimes being "watched" can actually spur one to accountability. And accountablity isn't a bad thing.

But let me just say here that if you know a minister's wife and/or his kids, remember that they are just normal people too...folks with dreams, burdens, joys, sorrows, frustrations. Do not put them on a pedestal, for eventually they will fall. Go to them personally and privately if they have done something you do not understand. Honor them, yes, if they are serving God honorably.

Love them. Encourage them.

Cheer them on.

On Sunday, a church member's mother came to our service for the first time. Which in and of itself was really cool, because this lady previously had been pretty down on her son's attendance of a different type of church than he was brought up in.

But that is not what I want to write about, so back on subject. I met her just before the service, her daughter-in-law introducing us, simply telling her my name. That is fine by me...everyone that comes through the doors does not have to know that I am the pastor's wife. Unfortunately, that gives some unrealistic ideas and expectations for who I am and what I do. And if you know me at all, you know that I am probably the antithesis of the "average" minister's wife.

One of the things that I do on Sunday mornings is lead the song service and the Praise Team (our worship group - a great group of folks playing a variety of instruments and singing). I noticed this sweet lady watching me intently during most of that portion of the service.

After church was over, her son came up to me, smiling. "My mom thought you were 17!" he exclaimed. I cracked up.

I am thinking that I either just received one of the nicest compliments in a long time OR this sweet woman is severely nearsighted. I am leaning toward nearsighted.

Whatever the case, I have to admit, it made me feel pretty darn good!

The euphoria of game #2 in the Pee Wee Soccer league is over. Yes, my friends, the kids got creamed this week.

I think I lost count around 8 to 0. And that was only halfway into the first half. By the break, our little ones were, well, being stomped, by an all-male, mutant, four-year-old team. My question: how did a coed league end up with a team of all boys, and tall, almost 5-years-old ones at that, when we have an even split?

Things that make you go, "Hmmmmm."

It was fixed I tell you! It had to be fixed!!

Alas, there was some vindication. Just after the half, The Youngest scored the first goal for the team. He was ecstatic. I think all the parents were on their feet.

His teammate, Cam, scored once, and The Youngest finished the game off for us with one more.

So what if the score was a bizillion to 3? Our little guy scored 2/3rds of those points, and this is one mighty proud mama!

A few days ago, my darling hubby had a lunch appointment at a local Chinese restaurant. Later that night, he took the kiddos to the golden arches for a tasty meal of nuggets and fries.

Now, you may be thinking, "Gee, that's great Nicole....uh, where are you going with this?"

So glad you asked!

You see, eating out more than once in one day, especially if Chinese food is on the menu, absolutely and totally reeks havoc upon my hubby's gastrointestinal system.

Huh?!

He gets gas.

Really, really, bad gas.

Face-contorting, room-clearing gas.

Those of you who have been married any length of time know exactly what I speak of.

Just before turning in for the evening, I went into his office to chat a bit and let him know I was turning in for the night. Too bad I didn't notice the green fog first.

"OH! MAN! Did you...?"

He starts to laugh. Dead giveaway. I make a quick exit to the livingroom. He follows me. Gaseous funk cloud follows too.

"Don't follow me! It is coming with you!"

Belly laughter. He thinks this is just SO funny.

A little bit later, we have turned in for the night. He falls asleep on his back and starts breathing in this really shallow, loud way that is really annoying. I nudge him, tell him he is snoring, and he rolls over. I turn the opposite way and settle down for a good snooze.

That is, until...

"OH MAN! You nasty pig!!! Are you awake?"

No answer. Breathing remains deep and regular. I am about to gag. I take those short little gaspy breaths to try to break through the funk. It finally passes, and I settle back in, beginning to doze. I am in that almost asleep, really relaxed, dream-like state, when....

He did it AGAIN! "YOU ARE DISGUSTING!" I hiss. I tuck the blankets around him tight, hoping for a reprieve, pledging to move to the bottom bunk of the boys' room if I have to gasp through another. He continues sleeping, breathing deeply, totally oblivious.

Or so I thought.

The next morning I tell him about how his fumes actually woke me up. And he laughs. And laughs. And laughs.

"I know. I was awake!"

"You what?!"

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the honeymoon ended LONG AGO!

"Jesus said to him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." ~John 14:6

"If you are walking daily with the Lord, you will not have to find God's will - you will already be in it... Walking closely with God each day guarantees that you will be exactly where He wants you to be. You would have to reject all of the Holy Spirit's activity in your life in order to get out of the will of God... Too often, we would prefer a road map of our future rather than a relationship with the Way. It often seems easier to follow a plan than to cultivate a relationship... If you want to know God's will, take time to cultivate your relationship with Jesus and learn to identify His voice. He is more than willing to show you the way."

~Experiencing God Day by Day, Henry T. Blackaby & Richard Blackaby.

It is the time of year that I both love and loathe. You see, while my baby sis, Janie, can be neurotic about her diary entries, I am thus concerning summer vacation planning.

It totally engulfs my life until I know that everything is planned, reservations are made, the route is staked, costs are estimated, list upon list is created... You get the picture.

We are planning to go away the end of July into mid-August. "Nicole, why in world are you making plans now, if it is 3 months away?"

So, glad you asked! This year we are planning a cross country trek to CA with a stop at the Grand Canyon. And around that seventh wonder of the world, lodging books up rather quickly, as you might imagine.

So, I have spent the last two evenings looking at routes, researching hotel prices, calculating gas mileage... And, I am dying to have it all in order, and I JUST CAN'T SPEND ANYMORE TIME ON IT RIGHT NOW because I have too much to do today.

And this, my friends, makes me crazy.

You have to read today's first entry to understand this one.

Well, it seems that the hubby and I were both a bit hasty. He hung up WAY too fast, without explaining what he really wanted me to do, which was just call the guy and say that he was on the way. But when he heard me say, no, he just hung up. So, we were both wrong - all that frustration for a simple lack of communication!

AAAACCCCKKKKK!!!